Tuesday, May 5, 2015

Dear Husband of a SAHM

Dear Husband of a SAHM,

There is bread on the mantlepiece.  That's not a metaphor, though I suppose it could be for the way I feel out of place today.  No, there is literally bread on the mantle.  It's there because when I was unloading the car the baby was screaming like feral hyenas were about to eat her.  This was after the dryer tore up and did I mention the car is making a funny noise?

Did I also mention how glad I am to see you?  It's more than just the fact that I spend my day carrying on a one sided conversation about poop and yummy-in-your-tummy pureed bananas.  It's that you listen and care about the most mundane minutiae.  It's that you are my partner on this voyage and when days have been rough, you help me stay afloat.  I love to hear about your day, even when I struggle to make more than the most basic contribution to the conversation.  Please never stop telling me about the office politics and projects on tap just because I only nod.  My day to day experiences don't give me a parallel.  Well, there are some playground politics I could shock you with.

Mostly I want to say thank you for all you do.  I know there is a lot of stress being the sole financial provided for our little family.  I know it's hard to work all day and come home to a fussy, teething baby and a wife who is wearing a ponytail for 72nd straight hour.  Sometimes I think you must miss the girl who wore shorts to be cute and flirty and applied makeup everyday.  Now I wear them to clean the shower.  Here's a secret, sometimes I miss her too.  Thank you for still seeing me and loving me the same as you did when I was that coiffed, professional girl.

You didn't see, but when you told me that you loved me just now, I was blinking back tears, partly because the beans had just exploded in the previously clean microwave, and partly because I love you so much.  I love how much you love our little one.  It would be easy, and perhaps even justifiable, to come in from a long day eat, watch tv, and leave the baby caring completely up to me.  You don't though.  I so enjoy watching the two of you play.  No one else can make her giggle as loud and long as you can.  You are a great dad and all of us are blessed by your active involvement as a parent.

Thank you for providing me with the opportunity to stay home and the support to not lose my mind doing it.  We talked about this for so long, but I was still sort of amazed when it actually happened.  I suppose I should close this, dear husband, before all this praise goes to your head, but know that we are your biggest cheerleaders and fans.  You may have been in a meeting when she pulled up the first time, but  you being there made it possible for me to be home cheering her on.  I hope her first word is Dada because you deserve it.

Now, if you go get the bread from the mantle, I'll set this supper on the table.

Harried, but grateful SAHMs

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