Some people know what's been going on and others don't, so for those people it isn't so much an update as a date, without wine or soft lighting. I don't have high expectations for a second date. No, I suppose it's really more of a news flash for them.
Josh and I have been trying to get pregnant for 17 months. Yeah, 17...it's been a long time. Granted, I know it has not been Nearly as long as other people have tried, but I'm pretty tired of it. After 13 months we finally went to the doctor and were officially diagnosed as the big I word (infertile). Gosh I hate the sound of it. It sounds better than barren though. Barren just makes me think of Sarai in the desert.
My ob/gyn found a cyst and referred us to a specialist. The specialist did more blood tests (seriously, at this point a stranger on the street could walk up and ask for blood and I'd just give him a vein no questions asked) and did yet another ultrasound, this one with many interns present. I now have no dignity or modesty left. All that found out that I have endometriosis. It's not advanced as best the specialist can tell, but that does appear to be the sole reason we aren't getting pregnant. We are still waiting for some more blood results, but those are expected to be negative. The doctor is suggesting surgery, which I will do as soon as possible.
This sounds bad, but it's actually super good news! I've been excited all afternoon since I talked to him. After getting the endometriosis taken care of 70-80% of women get pregnant within the next six months! That is amazing. I was doing my best to hold on to hope, but after that many months of being disappointed, it was pretty hard. Now I feel like I at least have a decent chance again.
I have hated struggling and failing to get pregnant each month. It seems like every single woman around me has had a kid since we've been trying. BUT, there have been good things that came out of this. If we had gotten pregnant right off, Josh would have had a hard time leaving a stable job to go back to school. I've learned a lot about myself and how I deal with issues (not always great, just ask Josh). And I feel like I finally came to a point where I was going to be okay with not having kids biologically as long as I felt like that was God's plan. I think sometime I will blog about the top five things I learned, but Josh needs the computer back to do homework. So that's where we stand, surgery soon-ish, hopefully a pregnancy by the end of the year (squeal!). I'll let you know when they go to cut me open, not really it's laparoscopic, so you can be praying please. If I ever get pregnant there will be lots of cyber jumping up and down, get your knees and back ready for that cause it's gonna happen!
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